Tuesday, June 30, 2009

A year in review.

To celebrate the one year mark let's go back a few years to better days...

My poor baby Lilypie just fell off the end of my tracker and had to start right back at the beginning - sometimes that is how I feel about this journey. I looked back at all my monthly entries over the past year and the following words decribe my feelings at each month of waiting:

1. Excited, naive
2. Hopeful, positive
3. Disappointed
4. Pissed, deceived
5. Numb, scared to feel
6. Energized
7. Feeling close
8. Realistic, trying to find distractions
9. No end in sight, bored
10. Never felt better, completely distracted
11. Reflective, moving forward

And now, the best words to describe completing month 12 would be...ALL OF THE ABOVE.

I wonder what 13 will bring...

Monday, June 29, 2009

"I didn't even feel it"

Mommy: (yesterday morning) "Sara, it is your birthday today! You are now 5-years-old!"
Sara: (mouth open and wided-eyed) "And Mommy, I didn't even feel it...I was sleeping the whole time!"

Sunday, June 21, 2009

5h 13m 13s

I DID IT!!!!! I came in a little slower then I had wanted, but with most of the run at a temperature of 28C I'm just glad I was able to finish!!!!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

A Conversation with Me, Myself and I

“When is this going to happen?”
“Maybe it won’t.”
"Of course it will, this is meant to be”.
“Who am I kidding; nothing in life is for sure.”
“I wonder how old he will be.”
“I wonder if she will have lots of hair."
“He will be beautiful."
"Don't get too excited, nothing has happened yet."
“I hope there are no more delays."
“Of course there will be more delays; there have been delays every month since the start.”
“Maybe something will happen this month.”
"Maybe I will get the call at work this week."
"Are we going to be one of those families that EVERYTHING goes wrong?"
"We are going to be one of those families that everything goes right and your baby will be home before we know it!"
"Why hasn't my case worker contacted me?"
"Probably avoiding me because of more delays."
"I wonder if her hair will be hard to take care of."
"I won't have to worry as much about the hair with him."
"I have a long time to wait still."
"I can't believe that we might not even have a referral by summer."
"Everything happens for a reason blah blah blah"
"I wonder if we will meet his birth family."
"How old will she be?"
"Where will I be when they call?"
"They are never going to call."
"Why is it taking so long?"
"I need to see that beautiful face."

And so on and so on...over and over...

What do you talk to yourself about??????

Sunday, June 14, 2009

I think I can I think I can

ONE WEEK until the marathon...yikes!

Running shoes/socks - check
Hat/shorts/shirt - check
Band-aids for blisters - check
Sport gels/drinks - check
ipod/nike+ - check

26.2 miles...ready or not, here I come.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Please sign...

Please support Bill C-397- An Act to Amend the Citizenship Act Petition to Members of Parliament. http://www.petitiononline.com/C397/petition.html

Currently, if our child (born in Ethiopia and will become a Canadian citizen) were to give birth to his/her own child anywhere outside Canada, our grandchild can NEVER become a Canadian citizen - just because our child was not born in Canada.

Monday, June 08, 2009

Shopping addiction...

Well, admitting you have a problem is the first step...right? I confess - I am addicted to shopping...well, not just to shopping in general, but BARGAIN shopping. Searching, rummaging, lurking, hovering, etc. for a good deal on any item (but mostly shoes and clothes) gives me such a rush...and a deal on designer labels...well, I don't even think there are words to describe that feeling...whether it is a pair of Nine West shoes for me, Gap jeans for Sara or Ralph Lauren underwear for Chad...it all feels the same...ultimate satisfaction.

I am not even ashamed to admit that one of the first places I go to in almost any store is straight to the clearance rack! I LOVE it...the rush of finding "it". And I prefer to shop alone - other people just slow me down - I can sometimes spend hours in just one store. I like what I like - and I don't need someone talking me in or out of buying something.

I often wander over to the infant section to see what deals I could have gotten if we knew the age/sex of our new little one and I just die when something is a really really good deal and I have to walk away...just torture and so unfair. However, sometimes I just can't help it and buy for my friends children - I just can't leave such a good deal for someone else. Chad better confiscate my credit card after we get "the call" - retailers will not know what hit them when I am through with them!!!

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

New life...

...right in our backyard, inside our treehouse.