What may have seemed like a simple gesture...

I would have to say that my family has been our biggest advocates throughout our entire adoption journey. In fact, I think my family may be as anxious and excited about our referral as we are. We often talk about the arrival of our babe during our weekly Sunday dinners at my parents’ home - like when it will happen, how it will happen, how we might tell everyone, how old he or she might be, whether we can convince my parents to come with us to Ethiopia to meet their final grandchild, etc... My family has supported and encouraged us through every heartache and milestone along the way. In fact, my mom and sisters were as busy as I was after the bankruptcy, spending countless hours writing letters, contacting media and politicians, and sending emails to anyone who would listen.

I'm pretty sure I have not mentioned this before, but my younger sister is expecting her third babe and is due in February – Yippee, I can’t wait to meet my new niece or nephew.

On Christmas, my parents surprised my sister and her husband with a gift for their new babe - and they also surprised Chad and I with one too. What may have seemed like a simple gesture meant more to me than the gift itself. Although, my sister may have the physical signs of a pregnancy and a due date, we both have the minds and emotions of expectant moms. Their gift reminded me how important this adoption journey is to more then just Chad and I. And that there are many people in our life that love our unknown child (whom we cannot see or feel, but long-for and cherish all the same) - just as we love and anticipate the arrival of my sister's unborn child. This adoption is as real for them as it is for us and they have just as much emotionally invested in this journey as we do.

Chosen by Papa and Grandma, with love, especially for their long awaited grandchild...

Today also marks 18 months of waiting for our referral. I have great hope for the magic and miracles that the new year will bring our family...

One more sleep

May all your Christmas dreams come true!

Happy Holidays!

Chad Laura Sara

Miracles do happen - FIRST REFERRALS TODAY!!!!!!!!!! - Edited with an 's' on referrals

Who needs the poll now - we have our answer!!!

I cried and cried and cried for the first time in a long time today - I am filled with more joy then I ever thought possible - I am shaking and my stomach is in knots - it is the best feeling ever.

I am just flying so high right now!!!!

Don't forget to vote!!!! - Edited with results

Will there be an Imagine referral before Christmas 2009?
Yes, most definitely - 10 (28%)
Possibly, trying to stay positive - 6 (17%)
Probably not, but I am crossing my fingers - 14 (40%)
No, not a chance - 5 (14%)

Signs of an AMAZING Daddy...

He builds things with you.

He lets you use his hat on hot, sunny days.

He cuddles you at nap time.

He shows you his muscles and makes you say "Put those guns away."

He eats ice cream with you.

He makes the best horse EVER!

He's not afraid to get his hands dirty for a little fun.

and so much more...

(plus, some of the pictures are really funny and Mommy always likes a good laugh!)

A Personalized Email from Santa - Your kids will LOVE this!!!!

You can send your child a special personalized email from Santa! I did this last year and a friend reminded me about it again this year. Sara was in absolute amazement that Santa knew so many things about her - her name, where she lived, her hair and eye color, he had her picture in his special book, what she wanted for Christmas, that she was being good in school, etc. It is really well done and seeing the look on she face when Santa appears is well worth the set up time. You can view Sara's special message to see how GREAT it is! Enjoy.

To create your own message click here. BTW, you can also create a message specific to teenagers and adults.

Sucker for Punishment

I have been having this feeling lately...

This strange, yet all too familiar feeling...

Do I even dare say it...?

I am feeling like we are close!

Yup, that's right, I said it! I know, I can't believe I am even going there. Like I don't know any better or something - Like I don't know the all too familiar end to this story...a night of wine, chocolate and tears, when yet again, I realize that my 'feeling' is wrong. And the cycle of emotional abuse begins again...and again...and again...and again. What a sucker for punishment.

Thing is, as sad as that sounds, if I did not have the "ups" with the "downs", I have no idea how I would have gotten through the past few years - the up days push me through the down days. The ups bring hope and faith and make the downs (almost) bearable.

So why am I feeling so close...? There has been talk that we could possibly see referrals by Christmas - what a gift that would be - even though it will not be ours, the thought of ANY referral is so exciting. And once referrals start, I know that ours could not be too far behind...how could I not be up at the thought of that!?!?!

So, I will ride this feeling for as long as I can. And who knows, maybe (just maybe) it won't ever have to end...